Marriage Legislation--Wisconsin and Federal Style

My, how we have progressed! Our governments in Washington, D.C. and Madison, Wisconsin have a common desire to ban "marriage" unless it creates a union between a man and a women. The recently defeated Marriage Amendment to our constitution would have provided the following addition: " Marriage in the United States shall consist of the union of a man and a woman. Neither this Constitution or the Constitution of any State, nor state or federal law, shall be construed to require that marital status or the legal incidents thereof be conferred upon unmarried couples or groups."

The pending Marriage Amendment that will appear on the Wisconsin statewide ballot reads as follows: " Marriage. Shall section 13 of Article XIII of the constitution be created to provide that only a marriage between one man and one women shall be valid or recognized in this state and that a legal status identical or substantially similar to that of marriage for unmarried individuals shall not be valid or recognized in this state?"

Aside from the nearly unreadable legalese, that is barely understandable, it is clear that our governments want to prohibit common law marriages, polygamy, and any "partnerships " other that a heterosexual coupling or union sanctioned by law. All legal rights would be negated for any other arrangement that two people decide is best for them.

Perhaps the next step will be to prohibit unions between one legged people or those who were castrated by a car bomb in Iraq. Why stop with the prohibition of same sex marriage? We can imagine that brat eaters and pheasant munchers should be excluded as well from any common marriage nuptial.

We are indeed grateful that our Governments have nothing better to do than to legislate who we can marry, or establish legal unions with. We must be in very excellent shape as a state and country to be able to dabble with our constitutions so that we protect our citizens from the hidden dangers of unauthorized marriage. We are indeed blessed.

The federal amendment is on hold since the Senate voted "no". However the Wisconsin Marriage Amendment will appear on the November ballot and we will all have the opportunity to allow the Madison legislators to manage our lives a bit more. Why not invite them into your bedroom to check out your preferences while you vote? Who knows, maybe another prohibition can be legislated. They of course are much more knowledgeable than we common citizens about affairs of the bedroom.



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Zeep